I’m Your Zero

I am thoroughly convinced I need to break out my Zero T-Shirt and parade around my house and office declaring my lazyness. Excluding last week’s free write I haven’t put a word down on paper since June 23rd. I will say what all of you are probably thinking: THIS IS PATHETIC!!!

I’m a writer who doesn’t write.

If you could quantify my writing into a report, I would be a zero. Perhaps even less than zero! I really don’t know. I am frustrated, tired, annoyed and most of all not focused. I won’t try to make excuses such as my job is stressful (which it is) or that my personal life takes up too much time. The fact of the matter is that I am not making time to write, which to me says I don’t want it bad enough. I have a saying: “If you want it bad enough, you’ll make it happen” and I think this is applying to my lack of writing. I made sure to make time to watch the new Stargate Continuum movie last night. That was not a problem at all. Make time to work on Spirit Hackers? Ha! Fat chance!

Perhaps I’m being too hard on myself. Maybe I’m putting too much pressure on writing. I don’t know. I’m trying to come up with a new plan. Currently that entails waiting on my new work schedule. Basically I’m going to be working nights starting next week. With time every day alone and with not much to do, I think that I should set aside a small amount of time each day to write, even a little. I don’t want it to feel like a chore (which the idea of writing does right now) and I don’t want to feel pressured. Hopefully this will get my ass in gear to get this story written.

Bottom line, I’m not happy with myself in this regard. Sorry to vent to everyone but I needed to get this out there.

5 comments

  1. I know what you mean about it feeling like a chore. I set ridiculously low goals for myself, and while it still felt like a chore, I was slowly progressing. Almost two months later I’m really excited about my story and have increased my daily word count. It’s still not super high, but it’s better.

    Don’t be too hard on yourself. Everyone has slumps. Hopefully you’ll come back to it rejuvinated.

  2. But I think it means something that it bothers you so much. You’d be a lost cause if indifference had settled in.

    And I think you ARE being too hard on yourself. Just coax yourself along, and soon you’ll feel that pressing urge to write again. Good luck!

  3. Thanks everyone for your great comments! I’m working on a new strategy and will be posting about it soon!

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